My 11 year old daughter is eating junk food behind my back and hiding it. When I confront her she first lies about it than she cries and usually runs away. She claims it is because she hates her self for doing it in the first place. But she still doesn’t know why she does it. She fat shames herself and I don’t know how to help her accept herself and get her to stop. She also avoids places that she knows make her happy despite her joy when doing them. She doesn’t have friends that she thinks she can “truly trust” and I think she is embarrassed to tell me. I have taken her to a therapist but she hated it and she said she didn’t want false sympathy. I don’t know what to do or how to help her. Any advice? Please.

So sorry to hear your daughter is struggling. I am not a mental health professional but it sounds like it was a good idea to try to connect your daughter to a therapist regarding the issues you shared and sorry it was not helpful.

I know that for many families it sometimes takes trying a few different therapists before they find someone who is able to connect with and help their children. I don’t know if that is an option for your family or in your community but if it is it may be worth a try. If you need assistance figuring out how to connect to or find another therapist please feel free to contact us again.

The National Eating Disorders Association is a great organization that has a lot of information about kids who struggle with different issues related to eating, food and body image. You can find them online at: https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org. They also have a  Helpline available Monday-Thursday from 9AM to 9PM ET, and Friday from 9AM to 5PM ET. You can contact the Helpline for support and resources by calling (800) 931-2237. They also have a Click-to-Chat option where you can speak with a live, trained Helpline volunteer by instant messaging if you prefer. For crisis situations you can text “NEDA” to 741741 to be connected with a trained volunteer at Crisis Text Line.

Please be sure to let me know if you are not able to access the information you need or if you would like additional assistance or support.  I will post your question on your website as you requested in case other families have advice you can use. Good luck to you and your daughter!